Whether a dinner party, drinks gathering or weekend stay, how do you ensure your hosting skills will dazzle and delight your guests? We asked three experts – the hotelier, the restauranteur and the bartender – all well versed in the art of hospitality, to share their secrets.
Sharan Pasricha, founder and co-CEO of hospitality collective Ennismore, whose portfolio includes London members’ club Maison Estelle and Oxfordshire hotel and members’ club Estelle Manor, and Scotland’s Gleneagles properties
The key ingredients
“Hosting should feel personal – a handwritten invitation in the post is so much more intimate than a text and will set the tone as a coveted occasion. The guestlist is also crucial. I’ve always said that the Estelle properties are for bringing people together that have plenty to say and nothing to prove, and I extend this rule to my home. A party should be unstuffy and fun, with raucous laughter alongside heart-felt conversations.”
Add an unexpected extravagance
“There should be a hint of extravagance. It can be something very small, like an unexpected tablescape or an unusual ingredient, but something that points to an evening of fun and generosity. Lighting is also key: everyone wants to glow at an event. Different layers of lighting, from dimly lit spotlights to a selection of candles, work well.”
The dress-code dilemma
“I always think it’s nicer not to have a dress code, but it’s worth mentioning if you’re planning on dialling it up so that no one feels underdressed.”
How I hope guests remember my events
“I want them to feel truly hosted, with warmth, wit and charm, leaving feeling looked after. My wife Eiesha [who is the artistic director of Estelle Manor, Maison Estelle and Gleneagles] and I are pretty low key,but I must say she is an expert at curating special evenings with hand-crafted elements so that occasions feel bespoke and authentic. I hope we make our guests feel very relaxed and like it’s their own home.”
Jeremy King, founder of Jeremy King Restaurants in London, including Arlington in Mayfair and all-day grand café The Park in Bayswater
The key ingredients
“Set the scene: lighting, music and timing are all important to balance to ensure guests feel welcomed, comfortable and relaxed – whether you are entertaining at home or in a restaurant private dining room. Food-wise, it is important to remember that there is a tendency for people to eat with their elbows in and, actually, sharing the starters is much more fun and ‘gets the elbows out’ and the contact going. Don’t
do all courses this way, though – it’s better to have the mains plated and allocated.
“Acoustics and lighting are paramount. There is nothing better than candlelight and, as the late Peter Langan taught me, great lighting is as much about shadow. Think closely about your acoustics before you put on music – there is nothing worse than barely audible music, and I find it better to wait until later, turn it up and always go retro, relevant to the demographic.”
Timing is everything
“When inviting people, be very specific about the time that dinner will be served. There’s nothing worse than invitations for 7.30pm, but some people don’t arrive until 8.30pm. Don’t have people at cocktails for more than 30 minutes or so – and weddings, one hour max. The golden rule these days is that coffee and so on is served by 10.30pm, so that the early sleepers can go without guilt and the carousers can dwell.”
Avoid oversized tables
“Table size and shape are fundamental in determining the success of the evening. One of the classic mistakes is to have an oblong table, with people sat along either side and no one at each end. So, if you are a table of 10, never allow the venue or yourself to seat five a side – always have people at the ends, even if it’s a squish. The same applies to round tables: once you have more than four people, the amount of space per cover needs to reduce, otherwise you are consigned to one of those ghastly wedding-table experiences where you can only really hear the people either side of you.”
Consider placement
“There is also often a mistake made when it comes to placement, with the big concern being who sits next to each other. Most dining tables these days are quite narrow, so it’s actually the person opposite, and those either side of them, who you tend to converse with.”
How I hope guests remember my events
“Conviviality is the key word for me – I want to create an atmosphere that is warm, welcoming, hospitable, relaxed.”
Shingo Gokan, bartender and founder of SG Group, who has opened bars around the world, including Sip & Guzzle in New York, Speak Low in Shanghai and Gokan in Hong Kong
The key ingredients
“Creating a comfortable atmosphere and space for guests is essential. This includes maintaining the right distance in service – so as not to leave long gaps, but to give a pause between courses – and ensuring pleasant sounds and lighting.”
Go above and beyond
“I always endeavour to provide drinks and food of high quality and presentation that exceed guests’ expectations.”
What I avoid “I try to avoid talking too much or being pushy as a host. The most important thing is for people to feel at ease.”
How I hope guests remember my events “I want them to have a memorable experience – and hope they will want to come back again.”
