If you’re based in New York, it’s time to dust off your Mr Phil Collins records and fasten your braces because American Psycho is coming to Broadway. Following its successful stint at the Almeida Theatre in London in 2013, director Mr Rupert Goold brings his stage production to the city that inspired it, with the opening night on Thursday at the Gerald Schoenfeld Theatre. Not wanting to be left out, MR PORTER got in on the act by providing all of the clothing for the cast. If that weren’t generous enough, we’re letting you steal their looks.

Since we’ve got 1980s power dressing covered, we thought we’d delve into Patrick Bateman’s grooming routine to see if there was anything we could learn from his fastidious ways. Read what we discovered, below.

PATRICK BATEMAN says:

“I pour some Plax anti-plaque formula into a stainless-steel tumbler and swish it around my mouth for 30 seconds. Then I squeeze Rembrandt onto a faux-tortoiseshell toothbrush and start brushing my teeth (too hungover to floss properly, but maybe I flossed before bed last night) and rinse with Listerine.”

MR PORTER says:

Swilling with mouthwash is advisable, but twice every morning is a bit excessive (psychopaths have a tendency to… overdo things). Use this by Aesop once after brushing with a Foreo toothbrush and you’ll feel as fresh as a daisy.

PATRICK BATEMAN says:

“I… use a deep-pore cleanser lotion, then an herb-mint facial mask, which I leave on for 10 minutes while I check my toenails… I wash the facial massage off with a spearmint face scrub… Applying a moisturiser is the [next] step. Splash on water before applying an emollient lotion to soften the skin and seal in the moisture… Then apply an anti-ageing eye balm followed by a final moisturising ‘protective’ lotion.”

MR PORTER says:

If you’re rather, erm, attached to the skin on your face, do not heed Patrick Bateman’s abrasive methods of “taking care” of it. Instead, use a day-to-day cleanser such as this one by Perricone MD and, if you require a deeper cleanse, something such as this Malin + Goetz face mask can be applied once a week. We should, however, listen to Patrick Bateman regarding the application of moisturiser. Do so, as he says, on wet skin to provide extra hydration. And feel free to give the area around the eye some extra attention with this by Penhaligon’s.

PATRICK BATEMAN says:

“Before applying the Mousse A Raser, a shaving cream by Pour Hommes, I press a hot towel against my face for two minutes to soften abrasive beard hair... Always wet the razor with warm water before shaving and shave in the direction the beard grows, pressing gently on the skin. Leave the sideburns and chin for last, since these whiskers are tougher and need more time to soften.”

MR PORTER says:

We can’t really fault Patrick Bateman’s shaving tips. The man is handy with a blade in more ways than one, it would seem. The only thing we would add is: always use a badger-hair shaving brush to work in the shaving gel.