Did I read that right – £4m seems a bit steep for a shirt, even for MR PORTER. Is this a holy relic or something?

Funny you should say that, it was touched by the hand of God.

You what?

Well, according to Mr Diego Maradona. It’s reputedly the shirt the legendary footballer was wearing during the second half of Argentina’s quarter-final tie with England in the 1986 World Cup, held in Mexico. Argentina won the game 2-1 and went on to be crowned champions. Maradona scored both of his team’s goals, the first of which was later disputed. Replays showed that it was a handball, which is illegal under association football rules.

I guess that’s why they call it football. But you are allowed to use your head…

And that’s exactly what Maradona did, in a metaphorical way, at least. The referee didn’t have a clear view of the incident, and the forward got away with it, much to the chagrin of England. The two nation’s heated recent history over the Falkland Islands/Islas Malvinas only added to the testy atmosphere. When later asked, Maradona said that it was scored “a little with the head of Maradona, and a little with the hand of God”. The turn of phrase, like the goal, stuck.

Bet England wish they had VAR then.

Don’t get me started. But his second goal was less controversial and more sublime. Four minutes later, Maradona dribbled the ball around five England players and into the back of the net. It became known as the “goal of the century”.

Wow, that does sound iconic, if unhygienic, what with all the dribbling. And now his shirt is for sale?

Exactly, it’s up for auction at Sotheby’s, where it’s set to fetch at least £4m, and might exceed the record $5.64m (£4.38m) that Mr Babe Ruth’s New York Yankees jersey went for in 2019.

I can’t help noticing that you said “reputedly” earlier – is there some doubt over the shirt’s authenticity?

Well, it’s customary for footballers to swap shirts after a game, and the story goes that England midfielder Mr Steve Hodge took home Maradona’s, although he had to keep it quiet from his teammates, who were no doubt a bit miffed about losing. Since 2003, it has been on loan to the National Football Museum in Manchester. But now, for the first time, it’s been put up for sale, with Hodge noting its “deep cultural meaning to the football world, the people of Argentina, and the people of England”. He added that it was “an absolute privilege to have played against one of the greatest and most magnificent football players of all time”.

So, it is Maradona’s shirt then?

Not according to Maradona’s daughter, Ms Dalma Maradona, who has said, enigmatically: “I’m sure Hodge doesn’t have it, and I know who does. I don’t want to say who has it, because that’s crazy.”

He said, she said – but won’t say. Who knows?

God, perhaps?

Them again.

Either way, since Maradona himself died in 2020, he sadly isn’t available for comment. Although Sotheby’s have verified the lot, photomatching the shirt against footage from the game.

It is official Argentina kit, at least, right?

Well, again, you could argue no. In a move that would shock modern Fifa technocrats, who now provide a 104-page document for officially sanctioned kits, the shirts worn by the Argentine players in that game weren’t strictly kosher. The team had brought heavier cotton jerseys with them to the World Cup. However, worried about the heat in Mexico City, where the England match was played, the coach had to quickly acquire replacements from a local shop. Presenting Maradona with a choice of two shirts, the star player picked his favourite, reportedly saying: “That’s a nice jersey. We’ll beat England in that.” Shirts were bought for the entire team, with Fifa patches and player numbers hastily sewn and ironed on, and Maradona’s prophesy came true.

It’s a tale as mazy as Maradona’s run.

And certainly one of the lengthier accounts behind a piece of football memorabilia.

OK, now try explaining Mr Kalvin Philips’ shoes.